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June 10, 2019
Me pictured with my Dad in Oregon
Have you ever toughed it out when you could have asked for help? How high would you rate yourself on self-compassion? June is Men’s Health Month in the USA, and Father’s Day falls on the 16th. As my son Hudson plays a huge part in our company, I asked him to share some thoughts on self care below.
As men, we are taught to swallow our feelings. In popular culture, masculinity is often equated with having no feelings. But according to the American Psychological Association, 9% of men suffer from depression, and over 3 million men suffer from anxiety. Men have feelings, and according to a recent article by Men’s Health, not talking about them is literally killing men.
At Suzi’s we believe everyone needs love and support. But, as is the case with skincare, emotional healing often comes from within. It takes personal acknowledgement of a problem to begin working on it.
It’s hard to ask questions like: Am I kind to myself when I make a mistake? Are my expectations realistic? How am I really doing? But getting in touch with those things matters. Coming to terms with how you feel is actually more courageous than staying quiet.
Self care involves setting barriers and expressing what you need. Over half of communication is listening. Communication also involves listening to yourself. The next step is articulating your needs and finding where those meet with others. Listening to yourself and others is true communication.
As a writer and artist I fail every day. But I often struggle with being compassionate about my failures. Getting angry at myself over failing usually makes the failure worse. So lately I’ve been stepping back after failing. It’s one thing to say failure doesn’t matter (when it secretly does). It’s another to accept that failure hurts. If you can accept the pain of failure, you can move on to what's next with a clearer mind.
I am not perfect with self-care. But I do keep an internal list of self care activities. I try and do one of these every day, depending on how I feel and what I need.
Do you know someone who could use these tips? Feel free to share this post with them!
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